I Can't Stay Away
by Tash-Sweet
Summary: They both know it's wrong, but they can't help but be drawn to each other. It's wrong because they both love other people.... yeah? So why does it feel so right?


Emily/Effy one shot loosely based on The Veronicas- I can't stay away, it kind of went in another direction than what I was going to do... guess I'm in a bit of a dark mood haha

**Title**: I Can't Stay Away  
**Rating**: 18, sex (nothing TOO explicit, more suggestions of sex than actual sex, Keffy kind of took it out of me lol), bad words and drug use  
**Pairing**: Emily and Effy, suggestions of Effy/Freddie and Emily/Naomi  
**Warning**: NOT light and fluffy, not exactly a happy ending.  
**Disclaimer**: I own nothing relating to Skins but the perverted thoughts in my head, I will not be sorry for this  
**Summery**: They both know it's wrong, but they can't help but be drawn to each other. It's wrong because they both love other people.... yeah? So why does it feel so right?

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If you asked either of them for a reason the first time they fucked in the dark, dirty, cold alley beside the club, they would both give you different answers.

Effy would tell you it was the drugs and she wanted a good time. Emily would tell you she had just had her heart broken and needed to feel something.

They would both be right. It was all of those things for both of them.

If you asked either of them if it would happen again, they would both give you the same answer.

No.

They would both be wrong. It would definitely not be the last time.

Effy would say the only reason she was fucking Emily was because it was fun and easy. It was anything but easy.

Emily would say the reason she lets Effy fuck her is because it feels completely different to the way Naomi 'made love' to her. She'd be right, but it'd be for the wrong reasons.

Emily was drawn to Effy, she always had been. It made her feel a darkness in herself she'd never felt before and it excited her more than she would ever admit to anyone. Even Effy. Especially Naomi.

She was drawn to the fact Effy would try anything. Fucking herself in front of Emily that time in the bathroom, the only contact being Emily snorting a line of coke off her shoulder or bringing handcuffs with her and letting Emily take her in a dark corner with her hands hanging from a stray nail in the wall, people all around. Or even the time Effy pulled out a small vibrator, sat Emily on one of the bins in the alley and only touched her with that, didn't even kiss her, practically torchering her.

Emily would call it off each time it happened. They'd dance, they'd kiss, they'd fuck, they'd half-heartedly straighten out their clothes, hair and make-up, although Effy tells Emily to wear lip gloss so it's not as much effort, they'd go back and dance, go home and Effy would wake up to text that said 'I can't do this anymore'.

Effy would roll her eyes and delete it.

On the eighth time that would changed.

By the time the eighth time rolls around, they manage to make it to Effy's house for the first time. Although the only thing that's different while they are fucking is that Emily is forced up against Effy's wardrobe instead of a musky alley wall or a dirty cubical door where the lock threatened to break.

They aren't that drunk and they aren't that high. They are both sober enough to worry about tomorrow, yet they still don't. Their kisses are that bit more intense, Effy hands are that bit more exploring and Emily's grip on Effy's shoulders is that bit more needy.

When Emily comes, it was the first time she did with Effy's name rolling off her tongue, the usual bit back 'Naomi' she had to force herself not to say not even an issue.

Effy always keeps her eyes open, watching every move Emily makes, how her head throws back and her mouth parts, short, quick breaths coming out, waiting until she comes down. Emily would concentrate on Effy's mouth, nose, the wall behind her, anywhere but the brunette's eyes if she was fucking Effy.

It would usually be the time Emily would unwrap herself from Effy, or Effy would push Emily back a little before heading back to go dancing like it didn't happen on the few of times she let Emily touch her.

But not tonight.

Tonight there was no dance floor to head back to.

Tonight Emily unwraps herself and Effy keeps her pinned against her wardrobe, forcing her to look at her.

Tonight Emily does look at her for a split second before mumbling an excuse about having to go and Effy almost tells her to stay, decides instead to silently give her jacket to walk home.

She nearly walks her to the door. Doesn't. She sits on her bed, watching the red head leave her bedroom without looking back.

Emily will never admit that she spends the night in that jacket, just breathing Effy in. She tells herself that when she drops it off tomorrow she'll break it off completely with Effy.

She knows she's lying to herself. She knows she can't no matter how wrong the situation is.

She's tried pointing out the fact that Effy is still with Freddie, and Effy pointed out the fact that Emily is still in love with Naomi and she isn't sleeping with Freddie anymore. Her therapist told her not to.

It didn't matter.

They have managed to get in deep with each other without even realising it.

Katie had noticed. Thomas had noticed. Even Panda had noticed the way they seem to dance closer than friends should, or the way they'd check each other out when the other wasn't looks and the way they just happened to stand closer or sit closer to each other.

None of them will say anything though.

Katie decides not to say anything about her sister being wrapped up in Effy's jacket with a content smile on her face either, it will be pointless telling her that what they are doing is more than fucking because Emily wouldn't believe her and probably just go off on a rant anyway.

She decides instead to wake Emily up, tells her to go out and clear her head because she must be hanging.

They both know Emily is completely sober.

She agrees anyway, showers, changes and slips Effy's jacket back on before leaving.

Emily swears she didn't mean to walk to Effy's house, wills her own legs to carry her away but they don't and she curses them for it.

It doesn't take Effy long to answer, standing there in her underwear and tank top and Emily can't help but check her out.

She's too sober for this. They both are.

Effy opens the door a little wider, motioning for Emily to come in.

She closes it and backs Emily up against the wall softly, leans in for a long, deep kiss that makes Emily's knees weak. Emily clears her throat, shrugs the jacket off to give it back to Effy. Effy takes it off her and throws it somewhere, grabs Emily before she turns to leave, traps her against the wall again.

She forces Emily to look at her eyes, silently begging her and shakes her head 'no'. She takes a hold of Emily's hand, leads her upstairs to her room and then leans her on the bed, crawling over her and kisses her again, lets her light bodyweight rest perfectly on top of the red head.

It's so much all at once for Emily; she pulls back a little, but still lays there. Effy looks over her features, tracing them with her fingers, over Emily's forehead, down her nose, under her eyes, across her cheeks, down her jawline and finally up to her lips and Emily puckers them just slightly in a kiss.

Emily spots a picture, one of Effy with Freddie behind her and his arms wrapped around her from behind. She stretches over, places it face down on the bedside cabinet before looking back at Effy, who smiles and traces her hand down to Emily's chest, playing with the gold 'E' necklace Naomi brought her, twirls it until the clasp comes into view, undoes it and drops it on top of the picture.

It's so much for her, but she lets it happen anyway.

They just spend what feels like hours kissing, slightly moving against each other, but neither of them making it lead to sax because somewhere in the back of their minds, they know this isn't about that, this is just about being.

When they pull back again, Emily yawns. She looks a little mortified and an embarrassing blush creeps up her face. She doesn't need to tell Effy it's because she's tired and not because Effy was boring. The brunette just smiles at her and rolls onto her side, holding on to Emily tightly around her waist.

Emily stiffens.

She goes to sit up, but Effy moves her hand on her waist up to Emily's shoulders, pushing her back down, the 'stay' she wants to say already implied and Emily can do nothing but lay back down and relax into Effy's tight embrace.

It doesn't take Effy long to fall asleep, but Emily stays wide awake, just thinking. Doesn't want complicated. Hates complicated.

And with Effy it was just fucking. Pure and simple.

She knows it isn't true.

She shifts slightly to get more comfortable and Effy must think she's planning on leaving because her grip firms.

Emily stays another three days before she tells Effy she can't live out of her clothes any longer.

Two weeks later they still aren't together, it is still just an addiction to see each other, and they've still been fucking rough and almost violent but usually Emily will go back to Effy's and stay the night before heading home early the next morning. Effy is still with Freddie.

One of those nights; Effy left Emily beyond sore when she decided to play with a new toy. It was big and it was fat, it split Emily open more than she was ready for. At first Effy was careful and slow, picking her up against the wall and letting Emily go at her own comfortable pace. Then Effy took her hard from behind, the bed banging against the wall. She had cuts on her hips where Effy was digging into her and down her back when Effy scratched there as well. She felt like half her hair was pulled out when Effy gripped onto it when she was getting close to coming herself.

Another week later, Naomi begs for Emily to take her back. Promises things will be different.

Emily says yes.

Three hours later she is back in Effy's bed.

She doesn't stay at Effy's that night, she told her about Naomi obviously. The only indication of Effy feeling mad about it was nails digging into her side, no emotion on her face.

Katie finally tells her what she's doing is wrong.

Emily doesn't care.

Since being back with Naomi, Emily only stays over at Effy's every other day, and when she does things feel strained, to the point where for once... Effy calls it off.

She doesn't see Effy for over a week. Focuses on loving Naomi how she use to and assumes Effy's doing the same with Freddie.

It doesn't work. She doesn't love Naomi anymore, but she still stays with her.

She's half asleep when she hears Katie arguing with someone downstairs, just rolls over and puts her pillow over her head. Hears her shout 'not in my house' at the person, then a 'fine' in return.

Three minutes later, she is getting hauled out of bed by her hand and dragged downstairs out the door still in her sleepwear. Seconds after that, she is pushed up roughly against the wall of her house, a leg instantly between her own pushing up in a frenzy and she can't help but moan, feeling teeth scraping down her neck, surely to leave a mark and she tilts her head towards Effy's, breathing in her shampoo and she shivers, her nails scratch the back of Effy's neck, hears her mumble something like 'it's been too long' or 'I missed this' but the rush she has around her body muffles everything.

She doesn't hear Naomi's gasp.

Effy does.

She slowly withdraws from Emily, turns around and smirks at the blonde.

Naomi stalks up to her, and Emily swears you could hear the slap Effy got down the street, she looks at Naomi shocked before inspecting Effy's cheek.

Naomi looks confused between the two before storming off. She takes Effy up to her room where Katie is, gives Katie a death glare before she opens her mouth to say something. She sits Effy on her bed while she gets changed and leaves as quietly as she came in.

Of course they end up back at Effy's house. Emily notices the picture of Freddie and Effy in the bin, she doesn't even know if they've split up yet. She then sees her gold necklace is still on the side, she'd completely forgotten about it, grabs it and lets it join the picture in the bin.

She lays on the bed with Effy, holding her, wondering what will come next. Nothing's ever perfect, and this situation certainly never would be.

They would have to wait and see.

Or just let it burn.


End file.
